Monday, October 24, 2011


I came very close to getting a tattoo once. It was Spring Break '97. Panama City, Florida. My inebriation was high and my inhibitions were low. With what image was I considering branding myself? A lion carrying an Italian flag. So ridiculous on so many levels. (The lion is my fraternity's mascot and my zodiac sign.) Had I done it, I would regret having that tattoo now.

Why am I recalling this cautionary tale from my youth? This week, Mattel unveiled a limited edition Barbie doll complete with permanent tattoos. Parents, myself included, were in an uproar:

The inked-up "Tokidoki" Barbie
But why the uproar? This is obviously a publicity stunt for a collector's item. And parents who don't like it don't have to buy it. I calmed down about the tatted doll, named Tokidoki Barbie. What bugs me more is her pugnacious little pet dog named "Bastardino." Yes, Bastardino. Nice:

This dog's a little pr!ck
Even though I've come clean, so to speak, when it comes to tattoos, I recognize they are a big draw for kids the Peanut's age. Due to my own close call I wouldn't want the Peanut getting a permanent one anytime soon. Then again, she may very well have one right now:
The Girl with the Dinosaur Tattoo
She's had this dinosaur tattoo on her forearm since a birthday party last month. A freakin' month. Not even a Brillo pad and turpentine would wash it off. Is it ever going to go away? Rest assured, we bathe her regularly. Still, it clings to her skin. Then just last week at another birthday party, she thankfully decided against getting her face painted. (It's creepy and also a pain in the a$$ to wash off.) Instead, she got her other arm inked:

Even holding Lammie, she looked bada$$
That one came off in the bath that night. But Luna refused to be outdone. Our own little Bastardino got into the spirit at the groomer this weekend with some Halloween ink of her own:

The Dog with the Pumpkin Tattoo
Luna's ink probably doesn't give her quite the street cred that Tokidoki's does, or the Peanut's does for that matter. Regardless, everyone's tattoos will be gone soon. And so will Tokidoki Barbie.

If you're into tattooed Barbie, you may also like naked Ken. It's by far my most-read post ever.


  1. thank FSM you didn't get that tattoo. Man. Talk about regrets. Well done! I love Peanut!

  2. I think that doll is getting more of an uproar than she deserves. It's just a doll. And it's not marketed to the kids - it's marketed as a collector's piece for $50.

    If it wasn't $50, would I buy it for my girls? Maybe, maybe not. They're not big into Barbies so it's a non-issue for us. While their dad and I don't have any tattoos, I don't have anything against them. They know lots of people who do have them, and they know that they can't get one until they're adults.

    I don't know - I just don't see it as that big of a deal. I think that the more people get into an uproar about it, the bigger of a deal it becomes.


  3. Personally, I like the tattooed Barbie idea. Times, they are a-changing and there are a lot of moms (and dads) out there in this generation who have tattoos. They've become very mainstream these days and I know just from my group of friends that the kids don't even notice them, or if they do it's just because it's a "cool picture". That said, the only reason I really wanted to comment was for the temp tatt removal conundrum - baby oil, I've found, is the easiest and least painful (less traumatic) way to get rid of most of them. I'm sure you're already aware, but I figured I'd share just in case ;)

  4. Saryiel, I did NOT know that! Thaks for the tip. And Amy: I agree with you on all points. I hope people don't think that because I'm glad I didn't get a tattoo that I think less of people who do have them. Just my personal preference.

    Thanks for the comments!

  5. As always, funny and entertaining DKL! I agree that baby oil will solve most tatt issues for kids... however for a lot of em, it's either leave the tatt on, to wear off or to traumatize your kid with a wire brush and rubbing alcohol. It's ridiculous and it seems like they pop up more or more as the take home favors from Birthday parties. I have a tattoo and while I don't regret it... in hindsight, I wouldn't have gotten one.

  6. There are tattoos all over this post! I think that barbie is kind of good looking, but I don't think I'd get it for Cupcakes. I don't know... Like you, I'm more offended by the dog's name - wtf??

    Great job making a good decision while inebriated... it so often goes the other way lol. I agree that Peanut looks like a bad@$$ with that semi-permanent sleeve. Very nice!

    For Love of Cupcakes

  7. when I was a kid I had a ken that I used to dress up as a woman. I called him Cross Dressing Ken and he rocked some kick ass make up. He and tattooed barbie would have tore up the town together with that bastard dog.

  8. I have to admit being a big fan of temporary tattoos. I have a hallowe'en one on right now. I'm giving them away a one of the treats, too.

    I almost got a tattoo in my 20's - must have been around 1997. Sometimes I wish I had gotten it, but it was a sun, not a flag-carrying animal. It would have affected my teaching high schoolers as well. They would have read into it things that just don't apply.

    The Barbie is cute, but not for young children. Tweens at the least, and a collector's item for teens and up, I'd think. No need to encourage the real thing too early. Although I suppose that's what the temporary ones do. Oh dear.

  9. Where have I been?! Seriously?!! Holy cow, the sign of the times is upon us for sure! I always like to tell anyone considering getting a tattoo to think about how it will look when they are old and wrinkly.

    Honestly, no reason to argue about the doll, it's done; but I, personally, think it's pathetic!


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