We should consider ourselves blessed. After all, only one church congregation could claim Andrew Lloyd Weber as a member. That's right. The acclaimed composer of Phantom, Cats, and Evita, among others, is now focusing on the smaller stage. The MUCH smaller stage: Christmas pageants.
|This is Andrew Lloyd Weber|
Of course, Mr. Weber's involvement totally justifies the four hours - FOUR HOURS - we spent at church one Sunday, including the service. Still, I submit the only people who should be spending that much time at church on Sundays are clergy. What Mr. Weber doesn't realize is we've got other things to do. You see, he can't be bothered wasting his time with such trivial pursuits as food shopping, walking the dog, feeding children, and spending part of your Sunday relaxing and watching football. Why would he? A genius doesn't concern himself with such things. We should be honored to have him produce and direct our little show.
|He composes masterpieces|
As he works his magic, some of the other children are running amok. They're allowed to because they are the offspring of the more "involved" church parents. You know, the ones who organize the coffee hour and set the Sunday school curriculum? That gives their little cherubs free reign to scream and run and act like maniacs in the sanctuary, making that description of the room quite ironic.
When you have Andrew Lloyd Weber direct your pageant, you're also giving him permission to yell at your children for inexcusable infractions such as missing their cues, forgetting their lines, and not speaking loudly enough when delivering those lines. Not to be outdone, the organist made the incredibly gifted little girl with the amazing voice cry because she forgot one of her lines during her solo. This isn't fun to Mr. Weber. This is theater. And theater is life.
|He can't stand imperfection|
|YOU need to remember your lines.|
(This picture was too awesome not to include.)
I know Peanut will want to do the pageant again next year. She won't remember the torturous, unnecessary rehearsals. I won't remind her, either. I know Master Weber really is well-intentioned, but it just annoys me. Maybe I'll just have to get involved myself next year. Perish the thought. Either way, it's all worth it in the end, for this:
|"Show me stink face, Angel #1"|